Dumbfounded and caught off guard

Shelly,

Thank you for sharing your story with us. You remind us the importance of self breast exams. Some tumors grow very quickly. You are courageous to undergo surgery for a bi-lateral mastectomy. You are a survivor!!!

Amy

"I have breast cancer!?!."

The words were hard to say for the first time and though some time has passed it's still hard for me to belive that I do, infact have breast cancer. I am a healthy 48 YO woman in Duvall Washington raising my 18 year old son and 16 year old step daughter to be. My eating habits are very healthy, my weight is stable between a size 10-12 all of my life and I have no history of breast cancer in my large family of 50+ aunts, uncles, cousins etc., But somehow, and for some reason unknown to me, I have breast cancer! Why? How? Now what?

All the smiles disappeard one by one, face after face after I told them my not-so-great news. It was shocking. My family, my friends, my co-workers; could not believe the words I had just said to them. They looked at me in disbelief at first; like I was speaking a foreign language they didn't understand. They went into shock next and then fear teared up in their eyes after it finally sunk in. I have breast cancer. They all had the same response and I do, why!?! It's not fair! Is this a bad dream?

Since that day on September 21, 2009 I have accepted my relationship with breast cancer and join many others as we walk forward together in peace to recovery.

I have been diagnosed with Triple Negative Infiltrating Ductile Carcinoma stage 2. I found the tumor on my right breast one day not too long ago; it was just smaller than a ping pong ball. The strange thing about my story is the tumor appeared overnight, one day I didn't have it and the next day it was there, a tumor. After many tests, the radiologist reported the tumor was not visible on the 7 different mamograms they took because my breast tissue was very dense; however it looked as obvious as the moon in the sky in the middle of the screen during an ultrasound. Last week on October 20th I had bi-lateral mastectomy surgery downtown Seattle. Though my left breast did not have cancer, it was my choice to have to have them both removed and reconstructed.

My choice is to live.
To live longer to be with my family.
To live longer to marry my fiance' one day.
To live longer to see my kids graduate from college, have successful careers and one day find the love of their life and get married.
My choice is to live longer so I can give longer.

I am recovering from surgery this week and will take the next steps to recovery and reconstruction over the next several months. I am loved and supported and will recover to help join my sisters to find a cure.

Peace be with you, Shelly