Terri, 10-Yr. Survivor, Learns God is in Always in Control

Terri,

Thank you so much for sharing your informative, interesting and inspirational story. Very well written! It's always good to hear from sisters in the faith.

My cancer, too, did not show up on mammogram. The lump was palpable, but very near the chest wall, so it wasn't visualized on the mammogram. Plus, I was 32 so my breasts were dense which also contributed to the mammogram not detecting anything. Ultrasound did show it, and well, the rest is history ... see my previous blog posts for the latest on my cancer journey.

Kim

10 year cancer survivor story

Cancer unfortunately will touch many of us at some point in our life. It may not be you or an immediate family member but chances are good that you will know someone that will have cancer. You may already know someone or you may be like me…a Cancer Survivor. I have found that cancer survivors have an instant bond and friendship. I use Cancer to spread awareness. Because of God giving the wisdom to physicians and prayer, will celebrate my 10 year Breast Cancer anniversary July 19, 2009. It’s funny how our minds work. I can’t remember sometimes the details from 2 days ago but I can remember every minute from July - November in 1999. Maybe that’s God’s way of keeping me grounded and keeping everything in perspective. Genesis 21:22 God is with you in all that you do. On July 1st 1999, I found a small lump in my left breast. I kept thinking why should I even worry, breast cancer doesn’t run in my family, I wasn’t over 40 - I was only 37, none of the risk factors of breast cancer applied to me. Little did I know that 80% of women diagnosed with breast Cancer have no prior family history of cancer. All I knew at that moment was that I had two sons, Jeff - 11 ½ and Justin - 10 years old that needed their Mom, and honestly…..I was worried. I had a mammogram at age 35 as a baseline and I felt healthy so when I went to my gynecologist on Wednesday July 7th, I felt the appointment was just for peace of mind. My gynecologist confirmed that there was a cyst and sent me for another mammogram (18 months since the baseline) the next day Thursday July 8th. The mammogram showed nothing…so the radiologist conducted an Ultrasound. So ladies, if you feel you need to be checked further if a mammogram doesn’t show something but you feel in your heart there is something there, insist on an ultrasound. Mammography works well for women that are post menopausal in their 60s - their breast are less dense. Mammograms are great for screenings, but they aren’t foolproof and ultrasounds work well for women in 30-60 age group. Most important, your best defense is monthly self-breast exams and yearly checkups. The statistics show 1 in 8 women will get breast cancer. Race is not considered a factor that might increase a woman’s chance of getting breast cancer. White women have a higher rate of developing breast cancer than any other racial or ethnic group. However, among women under age 40, African Americans have a higher incidence of breast cancer than white women. Breast cancer in men is rare, but it does happen. Roughly 1,900 men will be diagnosed, and about 450 will die of the disease this year. Many men do not even realize they can develop this disease. Unfortunately, this can delay diagnosis and as a result, some cancers are not found until the disease has progressed to a later stage. However, when cancer is found at the same stage among men and women, the survival rates are similar. Because the male breast is much smaller than the female breast, it is more likely the disease will spread to the chest wall. Now that I have probably unnerved you with those statistics let me give you the good news. If you are diagnosed with breast cancer, the 5-year survival rate for all women diagnosed with breast cancer is 89 percent. This means that 89 out of every 100 women with breast cancer will survive for at least five years. Most will live a full life and never have a recurrence. Your chances of surviving are better if the cancer is detected early, before it spreads to other parts of your body. In fact, when breast cancer is found early and confined to the breast, the 5-year survival rate is 98 percent. I like to believe that I am in 98% since I found the tumor and the cancer had only spread to 2 out of 10 lymph nodes. Enough stats…the Ultrasound did confirm something was there and I went to the surgeon the next day, Friday July 9th for a biopsy. That weekend was hard – just not knowing I found was worse than knowing. I have a controlling personality which made the waiting terrible but I felt God was letting me know I wasn’t in control and just trust him. Proverbs 3:5,6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct your paths. Less than 2 weeks from the time I discovered the cyst, I was diagnosed with breast cancer, and on Monday July 19th, 1999, I had a mastectomy and reconstructive surgery. After surgery and the complete biopsy, I was told my treatment was going to be 4 aggressive Chemo treatments every 3 weeks over a 3 month time period that would begin in August. Now let me share that you can always see that God is there and you can take instances that are perceived as bad but actually can turn out to be well worth the pain and anguish. I truly believe everything good or bad happens for a reason. So my illness brought more to light concerning my children that I don’t know if I would have known if I hadn’t gotten sick. We went to church. My sons were involved in RAs and Sunday school but little did I know that my oldest was really struggling with his beliefs. At the time I was diagnosed I remember thinking - thank goodness my youngest, Justin was too young to understand but I didn’t realize he was just keeping things to himself and he understood more than I realized. I was wrong as well that I thought my oldest, Jeff was in better spiritual shape after all he had even been baptized. But, Jeff shared with me after my surgery that he really didn’t know if there was a God. “How could God let his Mom get sick?” He was struggling with his faith. As a parent, how do you fix this situation again I am a control freak – thinking I can fix everything. But, I prayed to God that I didn’t know how to deal with this issue or how to correct it. My prayer was that my sons know him no matter what happened to me that I really believed he was in charge and I would accept the outcome as God’s Will. When my hair was falling out from the chemo, my husband and youngest son had gone to football practice. I was on the deck on Labor Day trying to shave my head….my oldest son, the non-believer, came out to help me….he said “I can do this Mom, I will shave your head and we aren’t going to cry because this is the last bad thing we are going to have to deal with…you only have 3 more treatments to go”. Philippians 4:13 I can do all things through Him who strengthens me. I believe the Lord was working that day with the both of us. Jeff grew up a lot that day and I learned it’s just hair, something that first came to mind when I was diagnosed didn’t seem so important anymore…Ladies, I really know what a “bad hair day” really is. After breast cancer, Jeff’s faith grew and he now completely devotes his life to God and is “on fire” for the Lord. He is active in his church and a senior in college and very active with the “Fellowship of Christian Athletes”. Justin got saved after my battle with breast cancer of which Jeff decided to get baptized again since he felt this time he wasn’t just going through the motions any more. Something all parents live to see is their children’s baptism and I had both of mine at the same time. Justin kept his head shaved the whole time I was bald. He actually had a teacher whose sister had Breast Cancer that in his year book stated she couldn’t have gotten through the ordeal without their talks. That was his way of dealing with me having cancer by going through the illness again with his teacher. Justin, a junior in college now is involved in many activities such as community service. His freshman year, he shared with me an Essay he wrote called “The Cancer’s Toll” of which he got an “A”. It was very enlightening for me to read his recollection of our Breast Cancer Family Experience. He writes “many people go through life encountering many unexpected events that will impact them the rest of their life. I believe the greatest impact on my life was when my mother had cancer. Although cancer is always looked upon as an awful situation, it changed many of my family members including myself for the better”. He recaps the events that I have shared with you today and closes with this paragraph “There is a greater appreciation for every moment we have here and he has a totally a different perspective on life. He values the time with each other and thinks everyone should enjoy life with a lot more playing than working (which playing he certainly does more than I wish sometimes at college). He also said “he loves that his Mom doesn’t dread birthdays like most women because that’s just one more year Breast Cancer free”. I wonder if my sons, now men, would have been different if there hadn’t been Breast Cancer and I chose to believe they are better men because of Breast Cancer. I like to believe my husband and I are also better because of Breast Cancer. We don’t sweat the small stuff. With the economy situation, we try to focus on we have our health and each other. Everything else will work itself out. We celebrate our 25th wedding anniversary last year and I plan on celebrating our 50th anniversary as well cancer free! Breast Cancer or any cancer for that matter isn’t a “death sentence” provided it is detected early. Keep your Faith – know that God is there every step of the way. Don’t wait until you have this type of experience to tell the people around you how much they mean to you and how much you love them. If you find that are going through illness or bad times in their life, it’s ok if you have a pity party even if no one attends the party but you and God, just have that good cry, pray fervently to help you focus on the good and remember my favorite verse. Philippians 4:13 I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.

In closing, always trust God to be in control. I will be the first to admit sometimes I still forget that I cannot control or fix everything. There is a Higher power – just let things be and never take life, my family, friends, health and so forth - all these blessing for granted!

Terri S.